LOL. My favorites lines:
"Oh, I forgot to mention, that nub of an arm? It's been replaced by a bionic arm straight out of the god damn future. Even the robotic arm is sexy."
"Sure, sometime the arm electrocutes your Ex and they pass out for a few hours to a day, but the doctor's assure you they will have that patched out within a month."
You have to read the thing to have that make sense, but it's absolutely brilliant!